Be A Warrior, Not a Worrier is a self-help book by Hayley Silk. We tasked our Participation Group volunteer Nick with taking a look at the book and giving us his thoughts
A counsellor I saw several years ago once told me that if I compared myself to other people, then I’d forever be comparing the worst bits of me to the best bits of them. That’s never going to help anyone. When she said that, it was like that figurative lightbulb going off inside my head, and it changed things for me almost immediately. I’ve had a few such moments when someone has said something that seems obvious in retrospect but which I hadn’t thought of before. This book is full of them.
I’ll admit to starting the book with some doubts – being urged to be a warrior rather than a worrier didn’t fill me with great enthusiasm – but it is written with such humour and insight that I was almost instantly hooked. The author, Hayley Silk, is a life coach, and her professional know-how of helping others experiencing difficult mindsets as well as her own personal familiarity with the subject from living with anxiety are clear to see. There are coaching exercises in each chapter, which the reader can do to help them get things into perspective and move forward positively. I did a few while reading the book, I can say that they help – I don’t they’re quite as effective as they would be if you did them with a coach, but they are effective nonetheless.
Written in a really engaging and personal style, this book gives the reader concrete tools and tips for dealing with those issues and circumstances in life that can lead to increased anxiety – work, relationships, health, money, and so on. It’s divided into chapters related to these issues, which is really handy because it means the reader can dip in and out of the book depending on what particular worry they are experiencing. I found myself doing that – going straight to the chapters which dealt with the stuff I get most anxious about (Health and Not Being Good Enough, if you’re interested) – but it’s such an engrossing book that I just carried on reading.
What I found most rewarding was that Hayley Silk seems to have written a book about exactly how I feel. By saying that, I mean that it became clear that other people have similar worries, and they are probably just as consuming for them as they can be for me at times. That really does make me feel better.
I imagine that this book would work best with those who are open to helping themselves and who are conscious of where their worries come from. I believe that knowing this is a big step on the road to managing with your anxiety, and the stuff in this book will take you several steps further. And I think you’ll have fun and some lightbulb moments on the way too!